Yesterday the gym I work at had their inaugural members day. It was a big event, kicking off at 6am with a live DJ, and ending some time after 10pm, with music downstairs in reception. I really had to wonder if I was getting old when I had to ask the DJ to turn his bad remixes of “Girls on Film” down. It would have been cool if I’d been pinging off my head at 11pm, but hey, it was 6 in the goddam morning, and I was at work - isn’t that enough? It was kind of offset by the free breakfast, which turned out to only be fruit, but was still good. I would have preferred bacon and eggs, but it is a gym after all.

My involvement in members day was teaching the very first yoga class in the new mind/body studio. Bear in mind, this gym used to be called Mike Hunt’s back in the 70’s, so the very idea of a mind/body studio existing there is quite amazing.

I finished training my last client at 10am, rode my bike home and ate my second breakfast - ironically bacon, eggs and hashbrowns (well, I wasn’t at the gym anymore), then walked my dog, Max. I did a little preparation for my 12.15pm class, then rode back to the gym, ready to destress any office workers who came in for a little lunchtime nirvana. I made sure I could work the stereo properly, then hung out with the guys from the downstairs massage studio, making fun of the life coaches who’d set up a stall just in front of the main squash court. They looked quite unapproachable, and I’m still trying to find out whether anyone talked to them all day.

Then at 12.10pm I went into teacher mode, set up my mat for the class, put on music, and took off my shoes. Looked at my notes, did a little warm up, checked my watch - 12.15pm. Decided to warm up for a little while longer, to make any latecomers feel okay with coming in. Checked my watch - 12.25pm. Kept right on warming up, until 12.35pm, when I realised no one was coming, and maybe the photocopied poster advertising the day’s events hadn’t been big enough to let people know about a brand new class. Wondered if a class where no students turn up even exists in time or space - and then went back to my warm up.